haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
You work out of a Hotel?
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
i think i just lost a toe
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
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