break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
