i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
