people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
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