we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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