How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
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