So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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