I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Randomize
