And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize