There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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