You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Randomize
