get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Randomize
