PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
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