this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize
