I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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