how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Randomize