there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
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