make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I think a kid would responsible me up
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Randomize
