I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
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