The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Don't EVER smell your tampon
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Randomize
