is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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