You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
