Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
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