Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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