No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize