So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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