one two three fourrrrnication!
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Need sex. Gaining weight.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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