Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
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