how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
You were trust falling into bushes
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize
