I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
