The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
