there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
