I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
