i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
