? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
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