oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Randomize
