Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
third nipple confirmed
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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