i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
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