I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
