But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Don't EVER smell your tampon
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
