Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Randomize
