ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
wow bdsm is so cute
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Randomize