My hand turned me down
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Randomize
