I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
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