nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
So I just walked in on one of our neighbors having sex...on our couch.
WHAT?!
He apologized for staining our couch, then asked if he could make me a drink. Pretty sure he was still inside her while we were talking.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
Randomize
