There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
