Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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