Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
