do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Randomize
