You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Randomize
